______________________________________________________________________________ T ||==\\ || || ||==\\ ||==|| || || B L E N D E R C O R P O R A T I O N || || || || || || || \\ // ------------------------------------ H || || || || ||==// ||=|| >|< >>> Presents <<< || || || || || \\ || // \\ BEDTIME1.DBC E ||==// \\==// || \\ ||==|| || || #017-SB07 -- [01/17/92] ______________________________________________________________________________ A Bedtime Story ------------------------------- by Snarfblat, the Fork of Spoon Michael Buckingham is legendary for his sweeping away of young children. He frequently picks them up as he is walking through town. Parents used to tell their children to be careful. They would say, "Freddie. If you see an evil looking man in a long black coat swinging a small gold chain, run away as fast as you can." Now they just say, "Stay indoors until you are 21 and you'll be safe." Mr. Buckingham should be left to himself. Rumour has it that he didn't have a happy childhood. His mother made him wear a purple jumpsuit every day because his grandmother made it. Sometimes he carries a rainbow colored umbrella. Watch out for that. He walks briskly, staring straight forward as if there are a million things more important than you. Then he turns towards you and grabs your first born child. "Hihowyadoing? Nicekidgottagoseeyalater!" Goodbye Junior. You can see your son's form through the coat, as he struggles to escape. But even as you watch, the struggles subside. Mr. Buckingham has taken many children. He has ways to keep them from getting away. His pockets are stocked with everything little kids would like to play with. That keeps them quiet for the walk home. After that nobody sees them. Most of the folks have moved out of that part of town. Michael Buckingham is 69 now. He rarely takes kids anymore. Sometimes he will be trudging through the main street with a suspiciously full looking coat. Nobody even notices now. Sometimes one of the old folks will laugh and say "There goes old Bucky! He always was a crazy one." If he overhears them he will nod his head and flash a quick smile. They have a right to laugh. Let them. Last week was the 100th anniversary of the founding of our town. Mike surprised us with a huge dinner prepared in honor of all the people whose lives he had ruined. "I didn't want you to think of me as one of the bad guys. I had a problem, we all have problems. Mine was just more noticeable." Almost every person in the town came to the banquet. As they chewed into the delicious meat, many of them remarked through full mouths, "I hardly remember little Petey." and "When you put it that way, I guess it was worth losing my sole heir, because I am getting this GREAT meal." We all knew Mike was a good guy deep down. Afterwards, I thought I saw something moving in his coat. It was probably just his full stomach. ______________________________________________________________________________ (C)1992 by The Durex Blender Corporation & Snarfblat of the Cybermax All Rights Available at the Door. No Reservations. *** Spread the word of Turnex, the Blender for the Next Millenium. *** The Durex Blender Corporation : Boston (617) 696-8156 - 24oo/8N1 - 24 hours